I Bust the Windows Out Your Car…

Instead of just hearing my opinion today I have invited a guest author,known as DJ, who will be offering the male perspective on the topic of CHEATING

Why Do Men Cheat: The MALE Perspective by DJ

Why do men cheat? Well, for one reason, it’s our hormones. We’re biologically designed to impregnate as many women as possible…we all know it, all we think about is sex. We want variety when it comes to women, some of us do get tired of our girlfriends and wives, and we look to someone else for sexual variety. There are so many delicious flavors out there to try and what’s stopping us? “She’ll forgive me, she’ll come back to me and everything will be alright”. Men look at other women when they are with their girl and think to themselves “I want that”. People tend to want what they can’t have, and if a man sees an unattainable woman, he is going to go after her, besides the fact that he is in a relationship.

Second thing: Temptation is a bitch. When men are in relationships, some women out there love to ruin a good thing, love to take what they consider a challenge, and like to prowl for taken men. They don’t care about the relationship the man and woman has built, they just seek to destroy it…they’ll be smiling once they wake up in bed with a taken man that they have just had sex with.  To women, these types are the hoes, the sluts, the bitches that want nothing but to steal a man from a woman. It can be insane for some men how many women come onto them or try to seduce them when they know they have a girlfriend. For some men, it can be very hard to resist all of these women just wanting to take us to bed. It’s like taking a kid into a candy store!!

Lack of sexual satisfaction. It sucks for us when we don’t get enough sex from our wives or girlfriends. We’re bound to go crazy! We try to talk to our significant other about having more sex or trying this fantasy or helping us fulfill this kink, but sometimes the girl doesn’t help us. Sex is a major cause for breakups, especially when a woman can’t at least try the man’s sexual interests. Ladies, if you’re not a freak, don’t get with a freak. Each man’s sex drive can differ but MOST men have a very high sex drive. We want it when we want it, and it’s only on our minds most of the day; it takes up about 98% of our brains*!!! Some men think: “what’s the point of being in a relationship if I’m not going to get any sex? I might as well stay single and get with as many women as possible…” So knowing this, I don’t think it’s smart for women to get into a relationship if they know they are not going to give their man the sex they desire or if they think having sex is the trick to get a man into the relationship and then the sex life just declines after the relationship starts.

A big problem is that there are men that are fooling themselves and get into relationships that they know they are not going to respect. They start out dating a woman that’s just boring, but they’re with them anyway. Or they get with a woman that they know they can use and abuse, and get away with murder!! So ladies, please step up your bs meter and be careful when things are too good to be true with your man. If you suspect your man is up to no good, then you shouldn’t be afraid to stand up to him and confront him that you suspect him of cheating. Yes, you do run the harm of showing that you don’t completely trust him, but then again, you wouldn’t want to end up a fool because he’s been cheating on you the whole time?

I do say this though, to prevent any heartbreak for a woman, and to avoid wasting time, effort and money with their woman, men SHOULD NOT be in a relationship if they know they are going to cheat. What is the point of getting in a relationship if you know you’re going to cheat???

*Not a real statistic J

 Why Do Women Cheat: The FEMALE Perspective by [Nat]urally Loved

My first reaction to reading DJ’s response was that of anger, but then I realized that his perception is pretty accurate with what is portrayed in the media. With that said, I thought it was interesting that DJ’s perspective of why men cheat was associated with their biological destiny, but when women cheat it was associated with being a hoe, slut, etc. I’m so tired of men judging women because of their sexual preferences. Yes there are some women who are promiscuous, but the same goes for men. In the end both men and women are sexual beings. To say that 98% of men think with their penis and have high sexual demands is false. I actually know a few women who divorced their husband because their partner’s sexual libido was too low. However, I do agree with you that sexual expectations are very important in relationship. Partners should communicate clear sexual expectations of eachother throughout their relationship.

I also think there are plenty of good men out there that are loyal. The issue is that we tend to only focus on our bad encounters with partners, but we never stop to appreciate the good. In terms of cheating I think women cheat because they are not satisfied. If our partners would just listen to what we need and make sure we were satisfied then I don’t think we would have a reason to cheat.

To answer your question as to why people continute to engage in relationships when they know they will cheat is actually a pretty simple answer…No one on planet earth wants to be alone. Thus their partner becomes a form of convenience and comfort. There is an analogy that I’ve heard women use before. Basically that your partner is like your slippers. You love your slippers because they are so comfortable and their always there to keep you warm. However, no matter how much you love your slippers you also love to try on your new stilletos once in a while. You can’t wear them for too long because they hurt, but the temptation is always there. I think people who cheat are looking for that excitement that is also shown in the media. Their looking for fireworks and flowers, etc. As a woman at some point you have to wake up and realize that true love is not defined by how many flowers someone can buy you, but rather by their dedication and devotion to you. My fiancé I know he loves me because he takes a two hour train ride to come visit me every weekend even when he’s sick or tired from work because he loves me and would rather be sick and tired by my side. I know he loves me because he does everything in his power to make me happy. Whether it’s making me breakfast in the morning, making me laugh in the afternoon, or kissing me in the evening, it’s those little things that let me know he loves me. Honestly, I truly believe that when you meet your true love that the concept of cheating is thrown out the window. You realize that the one hour thrill of going on a date with someone new is and never will be worth losing someone who is willing to dedicate his/her life to making you happy.

Here are some cool articles that I’ve found on who cheats more…women or men?

Who Cheats More Men or Women

More Intelligent Men (and Women) are More Likely to Cheat

Think Men are Unfaithful a Sex Study Shows Women: Biggest Cheats-They’re Just Better at Lying

Unfaithful Men: Why are Men Unfaithful?

3 thoughts on “I Bust the Windows Out Your Car…

  1. I really just wanted to give my reasons, briefly, on the main reasons why men cheat. It’s great to hear that you have such a loving, trusting, loyal and honest relationship with your fiancé. But it’s not so easy for other couples, and I thought I’d share why men would cheat. I really like your article and I agree with a lot you have to say. I think that women should be as sexually open as men and shouldn’t fear rebuttal from others for their actions. Society should not condemn sexually open behavior, it’s great to be sexual! You’re right that there have been women that have divorced their husbands due to a lack of sex. I was just giving it from the male perspective, but I’m happy you put that in there. Communication is something that people need to strengthen to improve their relationships. Human beings are not mind readers, we need to tell our partners what we’re thinking, in and outside of the bedroom. This would help the women that you say are not satisfied, and keep them from cheating. It’s funny that you mention that people don’t want to be alone, because I know a few women that don’t want to be in relationships right now. I think that they are just scared and don’t want to be hurt and rejected by men out there. I don’t blame them, because it’s really hard to find someone special out there. The dating world is tough, but then on the other hand, I feel like you won’t find anyone if you don’t open yourself up and take risks in meeting people. Yes, you might get hurt, but you might find love. As they say, you have to kiss a hundred frogs to find your once prince! What do you think about this?

  2. Wow….we’ve had numerous discussions about this, Nat. You know my stories….we are flawed beings. But we will definitely speak more on this. Good perspectives, I loved this….

  3. blacknright, thank God indeed you lerenad your lesson AND that you were woman enough to try and make amends. Sounds like you indeed had a heart change.When I’m around married people I try my best to get to know both parties if I meet the husband first. If there is a reason to I will boldly let them know that I want a marriage, not a mess. I’m convinced that I will get a mess if I get a man entangled with another woman, married or not. If he cannot be faithful to someone else, what chance do I have that he will be faithful to me? If the woman he is with is dangerous or unbearable at least he can wait to leave the woman for a while before getting into another relationship.Just leave men alone that are otherwise entangled. It is a lot easier. I am at the age where many men could think that I would be desperate because I have not found anyone to marry. I want to marry but am very happy alone. I don’t know if it is how I carry myself but married men do not bother me. When I was younger I had a married man (separated) approach me. When I found out he was still married I was so disgusted and offended that if that happened again only God knows what I would do. That was 25 years ago and it still stings when I think about that.

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